Tribes'n'Style: INTRODUCING THE TIE THING

Listen up Grabatologists! Yes I googled the collective noun for people who collect ties. Your ties are being put under duress by damaging clips and pins that are often unreliable and do little to control the kipper (the lower 3rd). Otherwise known as the business end of the tie. Introducing The Tie Thing. It is the necktie accessory your kipper has been crying out for. Like the cavalry coming over the hill, The Tie Thing will do all the heavy lifting for your tie, keeping it in place whilst matching your apparel style. Unlike necktie accessories designed for aesthetic purposes, The Tie Thing also controls your necktie without puncturing or snagging, and, unless you want to reveal your tie-prestige, does not show. Imagine you're working over an oscillating spindle sander, or you’re feeding a group of deadly arachnids over an empty aquarium. The last thing you want is for your kipper to be a rope ladder for some rambunctious furry back to use as their canny escape.

Highlights from the range are the 5-Pak specials that contain White, Off-White, Medium Blue, Dark Blue and Black. Each one finely constructed with patented durable cotton material using double-stitched button holes that are built to withstand rigorous washing or dry-cleaning environments without losing its shape or colour. If the 5-Pak is too rich for your blood then there is the more modest 3-Pak. With a range of colours from Black, Burgundy and White. All products come with a full 200% Lifetime Guarantee not to Rip, Tear, Fade (or in any way fail) or the guys at The tie thing will double replace your order at no charge. They'll even pay for shipping.